Saturday, July 30, 2005

And cue the deaf-mutes

A fascinating look at Scott McClellan's week:
25 July 2005
Q Do Karl Rove and Scooter Libby still have top secret clearance here, access to classified documents?

MR. McCLELLAN: You asked this question last week, and --

Q I did. And I'm asking again.
. . .

Q Specifically on the issue David raised a minute ago, and, more broadly, is the White House committed to doing everything it can to releasing documents to clear up any confusion about Judge Roberts' past, his history, his involvement?

MR. McCLELLAN: Again, it's all speculative at this point. There haven't been any requests made. But the Attorney General and Senator Thompson I think addressed our -- addressed those issues yesterday and made clear what our views are.

[Ed. note: No, not really, Scott. Except that hell will freeze over before you release any substantive papers on John Roberts.]
Q On another topic, what is the President doing to sort of mitigate the fallout from the disputes within the labor unions right now? Is he at all involved in this? Is he concerned?

MR. McCLELLAN: No, I think that that's a matter for those organizations to address.

[Ed. note: But the Whit House is tickled pink that Big Labor is self-destructing. Another item to cross off on the To-Do list.]

Q But in the spirit of cooperation, and you had indicted on October 1, 2003, that the reason that the Justice Department was asked, is it okay to wait until the morning, and the answer was that it was okay, but in the spirit of cooperation, why did the notification not go out until 11 or 12 hours later?

MR. McCLELLAN: I talked about that in that briefing, and addressed all those questions at that time. And the President has made it clear that we should cooperate fully with the investigation. That's what we have done, that's what we continue to do.
. . .
MR. McCLELLAN: People in this room have the right to ask whatever questions -- have the right to ask whatever questions they want.

[Ed. note: Getting answers is a whole different ballgame, though.]

26 July 2005

Q What's the case law that establishes attorney-client privilege for the work of the Solicitor General's Office(regarding John Roberts)?

MR. McCLELLAN: There is ample case law that is available that --

Q Specifically.
. . .

Q Does the solicitor general work for the people or the President?

MR. McCLELLAN: The solicitor general represents the U.S. government in issues. And so they are the attorney for the U.S. government.

[Ed. note: Ah, Scott, you blew it! This is an easy one: the Solicitor General works for the People.]

Q On the solicitor general documents, which you are not going to release, that is non-negotiable, the end of story, as far as the White House is concerned?

MR. McCLELLAN: I think we've made our views known.
[Ed. note: Crystal clear. We're not going to get sh*t.]

Q Do you consider Iran-Contra a national security issue?

MR. McCLELLAN: I haven't even thought about that, Dana, to tell you the truth.

[Ed. note: John Roberts was part of the Reagan gang involved in it.]

Tuesday was all John Roberts, no Karl Rove, and some wind about the Boy Scouts tragedy.

27 July 2005
On John Roberts, nominee for the Supreme Court:

Q Right, I understand all that. I've heard that a million times, with all respect.

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, maybe people that are watching haven't heard that, so I think it's important --

Q Well, you say it every day. My question --
. . .

Q Has Karl Rove offered to resign, in view of his problems?

MR. McCLELLAN: Again, you keep asking these questions that are related to an ongoing investigation --

Q Does he still have his security clearance?

MR. McCLELLAN: -- and those are questions that have already been addressed.

Q No, they -- I've never heard this before. Have you?

MR. McCLELLAN: The question has been asked before.

Q We haven't heard an answer.
. . .
So Wednesday was a lot about John Roberts and his papers, some geopolitics, and Rovian questions.

28 July 2005
SM: The economy remains strong, as the President has talked about in recent days. And we appreciate the strong reception that Judge Roberts has received from members on both sides of the aisle. Following on the Central American Free Trade agreement passage by the House, the President received a call from President Saca of El Salvador this morning.

[Ed. note: President Saca was reported to comment: "Holy sh*t! I can't believe you got that thing passed!"]
. . .

Q Why did the administration hold back on releasing an EPA report that acknowledges car fuel efficiency has actually decreased?

MR. McCLELLAN: I think you might want to talk to the EPA about that. I'm not sure of all the reasons on that.

Q Did the White House ask the EPA to hold it back as a way to ensure that it didn't get in the way of passage --

MR. McCLELLAN: I don't think it really has any relation to the energy bill, but you might want to talk to the EPA about it.

[Ed. note: Those crazy kooks at the EPA. Same knuckleheads who never turned their college papers in on time .]

Q I'm asking you a specific question. The two sides (U.S. and North Korea) are getting together privately. Why don't you admit that?

MR. McCLELLAN: I just said it.

Q No, you only say it within -- you're so afraid --
. . .

Q How soon will you be able to discuss it?

MR. McCLELLAN: Do you have something else?
. . .

Q Scott, last night on the Tonight Show, Jay Leno, who apparently is subbing for Johnnie, displayed a video of the President at the Capitol yesterday. In that video, the President walking away from the press lifts his hand and raises a finger. Mr. Leno interpreted it as, shall we say, a finger of hostility. Each of our fingers has a special purpose and meaning in life. (Laughter.) Can you tell us what finger it was he held up?

MR. McCLELLAN: Ken, I'm not even going to dignify that with much of a response. But if someone is misportraying something, that's unfortunate.

Okay, so Thursday was about North Korea, Bolton's recess appointment that the White House won't admit, and the "finger of hostility."

29 July 2005
SM: And with that, I will be glad to go to questions.
. . .
Q You were going to come to my question.
. . .
Q Let's not divert off of that, Scott. I was specific to this issue. Let's not get off on that.
. . .

Q Scott, The Washington Post this morning reports that, "Many days, no doubt, he" -- that's you, Scott -- "he harbors his own desires to finger his feelings about reporters." (Laughter.) That's what they reported. And my question is, since The Post also reports that "The President suddenly thrust his right hand into the air and extends a finger." White House officials yesterday said it was his thumb. Could this be interpreted as the traditional thumbs-up signal, or is it a mistake to confuse the President's thumb with his middle finger?

I have a follow up.

MR. McCLELLAN: Les, okay, I found all this kind of preposterous --

Okay, so Friday was about stem cells and fingers.

Monday, July 25, 2005

This just in, from BTW* News

Scott McClellan, maybe just a question away from a total nervous collapse. We hope.

Courtesy of BTC News who identified the intrepid reporter who asked this stellar question at today's press conference:

Q Yes, thank you. There has been a lot of speculation concerning the meaning of the underlying statute and the grand jury investigation concerning Mr. Rove. The question is, have the legal counsel to the White House or White House staff reviewed the statute in sufficient specificity to determine whether a violation of that statute would, in effect, constitute treason?

MR. McCLELLAN: I think that in terms of decisions regarding the investigation, those are matters for those overseeing the investigation to decide.

Q is Paul Sanford, an attorney who has been accredited as a White House reporter for Air America Radio. (The comments are great on the BTC New's posting.)
And here I was, afraid that the White House press corps would either get distracted or tired. Instead, looks like they're kicking it up a gear. So let's say a prayer to St. Sezni, patron saint of mad dogs** and by extension, reporters.

*BTW^ News, our motto is: If we remember it, then it's a good day for us.
[Ed. note: Not sure about the grammar rules on sub-referencing a footnote, but BTW stands for "By The Way."]

**According to those who know at the Vatican, Sezni was first offered the patron of girls seeking husbands but turned it down. Said he'd never get any rest and would rather be the patron saint of mad dogs than women. The Vatican, never missing a chance to fill a tough slot, stuck him in there.

Yes, but I've got a good reason*

Where is Darfur?
Who's the president of that country?
When did the strife begin?
What is the nature of the strife?
Who's fighting who?
Are there any natural disasters involved?
Are there any countries helping out?
How are they helping out?
Sudanese refugees fleeing Darfur (April 2004)

Reuters reported Friday, 22 July 2005, that NBC correspondent Andrea Mitchell** was roughed up by Sudanese security after she asked President Hassan al-Bashir why the American people could trust him to keep his word about stopping the violence in Darfur.

It would be great if Mitchell asked our administration questions that were as tough as the ones she asked of the Sudanese government. Here's my favorite quote of Mitchell's when asked about the incident:
"It makes me even more determined when dictators and alleged war criminals are not held to account," she said. "If our government is going to establish a relationship and push for a new beginning as Sudan reforms itself, they have to live up to international standards. A free press is part of that process."

And really, Ms. Mitchell is right. If our fascist government expects to do business with your government, we've got to have a government we can trust. And if we can't trust them, and they have no natural resources we want, we'll just have to walk away from the table. And don't think we won't do it.

Regarding the history questions above, check out Save Darfur's "History of the Conflict." More complicated than the National League Wild Card race.

* Personally, I avoid stories that depress me, like "Schindler's List." So I am woefully unschooled on the Darfur situation. But the old head-in-the-sand trick didn't seem to be working, so I have to get up to speed.

**Andrea Mitchell also doubles as the wife of Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan. When Alan was asked about the incident he made some ominous noises about raising the discount rate. Khartoum responded, "What's a discount rate?"

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Didn't get the bounce you wanted? Try it again.

[Updated, 7/21/05 12:49pm CT] This just in from MSNBC: three (3) train explosions and 1 bus bombing, going off simultaneously. A replica of 7/7. Hmph.

Two weeks after the London Bombings, Londoners get treated to it again. No fatalities at the time of this writing, but the London Underground was shut down. From what I can make out of the BBC Radio reports, there were at least 2 attempted detonations in the trains, and 1 on a bus. But either the bombs were not designed for the same carnage as the ones on 7/7/05, or they all failed.

I think we can disregard the possibility that they all failed.

Polls from last week showed that Blair and Bush did not get a bounce in their numbers from the London Bombings. Polling Report shows for the week of 7/13-7/17 that Bush's disapproval numbers were at 48%. His approval numbers were at 44%.

I say cynical, you might say paranoid, but after London took 2 hits it sure looks like the next up is an American city. I checked and there's no Vegas line - at least, not that they're admitting.

On the lighter side of things, Condoleezza Rice is in Darfur (Sudan), and she thinks things are getting better. That's in spite of the fact the Washington D.C. has to call the Darfur situation ''genocide." But she's got the panacea - open markets.

From the BBC: "Ms. Rice said aid could help development but was not sufficient on its own, and that open markets would create wealth." I don't understand - U.S. companies do so much better when there aren't open markets. Can anyone say Halliburton and no-bid Iraq contracts?

It would be a magnificent gesture on the United States part if we offered up Rice as a sacrifice and then the survivors of Darfur could eat her. Just a thought.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

You found petechaie where!

A beautiful night in Chicago, the White Sox are playing the Tigers, and I have the Navy's disease vector risk assessments at hand.

The Navy breaks it down by country, and the first thing I notice is that Russia isn't in there. That's because they have it under the Soviet Union. Can someone get the Navy a newspaper?

They have a little write-up on Italy. What could be going on with Italy? It starts off innocuously enough - malaria. Which hasn't been reported since 1988, and that was one case. The Navy generously adds that the World Health Organization considers Italy malaria free. But there's more: hemorrhagic fever. The Navy's answer to prevention - DEET. All over.

Argentina is a much more fun read. We have malaria; arboviral fevers starring dengue fever and Rocky Mountain Fever (and who says the U.S. doesn't export anything anymore?), St. Louis encephalitis (a hit for Artie Shaw in the 1930's), and the Argentine hemorrhagic fever.

Does it seem like a pattern is developing here?

By the way, the Navy recommends - hold on, it's coming - DEET, for prevention.

I can't help myself - had to take a look at another country. Bulgaria. And they have Congo-Crimean Hemorrhagic Fever. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Yep, roll out the barrel of DEET.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

What happens when you go out on a limb and the trees walk away?

The news coming in is that the incarcerated Judith Miller received waivers from Lewis "Scooter" Libby and she still refuses to talk because the waivers were coerced. Who could possibly coerce the Vice President's chief of staff to SIGN a waiver?

Maybe the line of questioning would be lead to others who have not signed waivers.

Maybe, as I suspected from the beginning, Miller is trying to cloak herself in journalistic cow poop because she's part of the conspiracy.

Editor and Publisher is reporting that Miller's sources did sign waivers. However, at the time of this writing, their web site is returning the message:
"This document contains no data."


But always remember, the Miller tempest is just a thread in the Bush Co.'s March To War. Wilson, along with 2 other reports, one by Marine General Fulford, reported that there was nothing to the assertion that Iraq tried to buy yellowcake from Niger. It was after Wilson's op-ed piece appeared that Novak's column outing his wife appeared. Miller of course had to be a player in this - it was her steady drumbeat in the months leading up to war about the WMD in Iraq that helped sell the Administration line (See! Even the "liberal" NY Times is calling for war!).

Miller's not a reporter, she's a co-conspirator.

Mark Buehrle in his victory over Cleveland 16 July 2005

And that's how you start the second half

The bullpen scared the bejesus out of us as the White Sox took the 3rd game of the 4 game series against Cleveland today (16 July 2006). Along the way, we learned that Ed Farmer played as "official catcher" for 2 years at 79th and Mozert (Chicago) in his formative years.

Buehrle (now 11-3) exited at the end of the 7th, leading 7-2. The bullpen made the game a litttle more interesting, closing it to 7-5 before Marte wrapped things up. Whew.

So if you're Kenny Williams, what would you be trading for before the July 31st deadline?
Up until yesterday, I'd say starting pitching. Sure, it's safe and no one can have enough starting pitching. But now that we know that Crede has 2 (not 1 but 2!) herniated discs in his back, I'm thinking we need a 3rd baseman.

The important numbers:

7 White Sox
5 Indians
Winning Pitcher: Mark Buehlre (11-3)
Save: Damaso Marte (3)
Losing Pitcher: Eric Westbrook ( 6-12)
[Ed. note: Look into what it takes to get a HOLD for a game.]

On the way this morning to get the desperately needed oil change for Sid the Cavalier (he's at 99,000 miles) I heard that tickets are going fast for the White Sox on their remaining home series on WMVP-AM (1000). Sure, I heard this on the Sox pre-game show, and their job is to tout tickets, but I figured: what the hell, I'm on the Dan Ryan anyway, might as well swing north and pick up some tickets for a few Sox games.

Got off at 35th Street and to find a bunch of people parked with hazard lights flashing, getting tickets. Grabbed my keys and wallet and got in line. I also check out the calendar, figuring out what games to shoot for: Monday, August 15 against Minnesota; September 19 against Cleveland. I get tickets to Monday's game (7/18) and the other 2 Monday games. Find out - from eavesdropping on the people ahead of me - that the Detroit series and the Boston series (this week) are almost sold out.

I ask for best seats available, despairing that the only seats available will be upper deck (a la Wrigley Field, damn!) and much to my surprise there are seats available in section 136. That's right behind home plate looking down the 1st base line. And exempt from the "Monday half-price" rules. So I got to pay full price. Whoop-ee. They better beat the Tigers & Magglio Ordonez.

One last statistic:
(1st team to reach 60 wins this season)

Chicago 60 29 .674 - 30-15 30-14 9-4 29-5 10-14 12-6 6-4 W3
Minnesota 49 40 .551 11.0 27-20 22-20 13-5 21-17 7-8 8-10 4-6 W1
Cleveland 47 44 .516 14.0 21-22 26-22 8-9 15-24 9-8 15-3 2-8 L4
Detroit 44 45 .494 16.0 21-23 23-22 12-13 16-18 7-5 9-9 7-3 W2
Kansas City 31 59 .344 29.5 19-27 12-32 8-8 9-26 5-16 9-9 5-5 L2

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Don't be mean to Karl Rove, he's Elizabeth Dole's friend

The GOP must have been in panic when they put this out for immediate release:
Senators and Congressmen Rally Around Rove.

Elizabeth Dole (R-NC):
"The partisan attacks against Karl Rove are out of control...He is my friend."

[Ed. note: That's great, Betty. I see you also go on to categorize what Rove did, that his lawyer Luskin confirmed, and gave permission to Matthew Cooper to talk about, as "rumor and innuendo." Where were you when your husband, in a complete abandonment of all that is decent, did those Viagra commercials?]

Sen. Norm Coleman (R-MN):
"My Democratic friends would be doing the nation a great service if the spent half as much time getting legislation passed..."

[Ed. note: Yes, we know, Norm. If we could just get the Dems to show up and vote the way you tell them to and ignore all the treason that's going on around them.]

More from Norm: "We have enough to do in the Senate in minding our business than to be sticking our noses into someone else's business..."

[Ed. note: Yep, he really said that. If you want to call him for confirmation, you can reach him at (202) 224-5641, or (651) 645-0323, or (507) 625-6800. Maybe refresh his memory on that whole 'check and balance' thing.]

Naturally, Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA), who never saw an opportunity to make an ass out of himself slip by, chipped in with:
"I don't see any evidence out there that he violated the law."

[Ed. note: Sadly, old Rick had his head stuck down a gopher hole when he said that. You can generally find his head there or up GW's butt.]

The RNC was even shameless enough to carry this bold, forthright statement from Rep. DeLay (R-TX):
"I support Karl Rove..."

[Ed. note: Here's what ellipses are covering "and that no-good S.O.B. better support me!"]

There's plenty more, so I'll end with this snippet from Rep. Peter King (R-NY):
"Republicans should stop holding back and go on the offense: Fire enough bullets the other way until the Supreme Court overtakes."

[Ed. note: Uh, what?]

*One last thing to note: blessedly, not an Illinois Republican to be found on the page. Call Hastert and thank him from abstaining at (202) 225-0697, or (630) 406-1114, or (815) 288-0743, or (309) 944-3558.

And home field advantage is secured for the American League

Alright, the first complaint out of the box is that television announcers, and Tim McCarver and Joe Buck in particular, blow at calling a game for those of you "scoring at home." I, for one, was scoring at home. Did you ever try keeping score of a game when you know the pitchers are changing every inning, that every position player is going to be replaced at least once, and bench players aren't necessarily going to play their regular position?

Well, I did. I had to rely on's Gameday to keep up with the lineup. And the Internet runs about 2 batters behind.

Second complaint - is it imperative that we see Terry Francona and Tony La Russa while they're being interviewed? Can't we watch the game and hear them at the same time? And while I'm on this rant - why wouldn't you interview the managers when their teams are on offense? We've got the managers trying to keep up with what's happening on the pitching mound while fielding inane questions.

I'll make this my last rant - 4 Boston Red Sox starters? I know the fans voted them in, but come on.

F National League 5
American League 7
WP M. Buehrle (CHW)
LP J. Smoltz (ATL)

Sunday, July 10, 2005

Citing Title 10, Subtitle A, Part I, Chapter 21, Subchapter I of the Federal Code; you, Judy Miller, are a fraud*

She had a good run, but Judy Miller's show "I am a Reporter," has come to an end.

*Alright, you got me. This section of the code applies to restrictions on displaying anything to suggest approval or endorsement of the Defense Intelligence Agency, National Reconnaissance Office, National Imagery and Mapping Agency, Defense Mapping Agency, Department of Defense, or the Central Intelligence Agency.

Oh yeah - you can't use the acronyms either.

Have troops, will travel (and we're looking at you, Iran)

Financial Times reports on 4 July 2005 that the MoD* is making plans for a significant withdrawal of UK troops over the next 18 months. Don't recall seeing the U.S. papers reporting that our staunch ally is making plans to get the hell out of Iraq.

London gets bombed Thursday, 7 July 2005.

A Reuters article gives us a better idea of what Britain's troop levels are: they want to go from 8,500 to 3,000. By mid-2006. That's 12 months, not the 18 Financial Times reported. The leaked MoD documents also spill the beans on DOD's troop level plans - go from the 140,000 now to 66,000 by early 2006.

To borrow from Matthew Cooper of Time - this sounds like a double super secret.

At the time of this writing, a Google search for articles on UK troop withdrawals/MoD leaked documents, returns hits only on foreign news organizations.

It will be interesting to see who Bush/Blair eventually finger for the London bombings, now that they'll have all these troops freed up and nowhere to go.

*Ministry of Defense.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

Candy-gram for Montana, Pittsburgh, and Chicago

Although the White Sox are getting their hats handed to them by the Oakland A's at the time of this writing, they are on track to win the American League Central Division. The last time a White Sox team was this good and headed for post-season glory, the season got cancelled (the Baseball Strike of 1994). So what's going to disrupt the White Sox this year?

According to Fox News, a major terrorist attack on the mass transportation system.

Juval Aviv, a counter-terrorism expert, was interviewed on Fox Fan Central. Fox Fan Central? Really? Do they lift this stuff from MTV?

And Juval was full of good news.

Fox Fan Central: Do you believe another terrorist attack is likely on American soil?

Juval Aviv: I predict, based primarily on information that is floating in Europe and the Middle East ... It could happen as soon as tomorrow, or it could happen in the next few months. Ninety days at the most.

[Ed. note: Ask work for a 3-month sabbatical on Monday.]

FFC: What portion of the American infrastructure do you believe is at the greatest risk for a terror attack?

JA: What they’re going to do is hit six, seven, or eight cities simultaneously to show sophistication and really hit the public. This time, which is the message of the day, it will not only be big cities. ... If you figured out that if you just move out of New York and move to Montana or to Pittsburgh, you’re not immune. We’re going get you wherever we can and it’s easier there than in New York.’

[Ed. note: Does Las Vegas have a betting line set up on this yet?]

Juval's parting words:

JA: In Israel, it’s very popular right now [amongst terrorists] to put one device to explode and time another one for five minutes later when it’s all calm, people are getting up, and the rescue teams have responded.

[Ed. note: Keep on top of fads in terrorist circles.]

Juval Aviv has been saying interesting things for years. He was a consultant for the FBI for ten years on anti-terrorism matters. Then he pointed the finger at the government and became persona non grata. The upside was that he didn't have to go to those awful FBI dinner parties anymore.

Aviv's company, Interfor, was hired by Pan Am and their insurance company to find out who bombed the Lockerbie flight. It was the Interfor report that stated that U.S. law enforcement agencies were monitoring and participating in a heroin-smuggling operation that run through Frankfurt, Germany. Furthermore, they were aware that Pan Am 103 was going to be bombed, and let it happen so their operation wouldn't be blown.

Juval thinks about this stuff a lot. He wrote a book, "The Complete Terrorism Survival Guide". It has helpful tips, such as this one for businesses: ask employees to donate DNA samples so remains can be identified if there is a terrorist attack.

He's got good advice for individuals too, such as: have a plan for pets, because shelters aren't going to allow them. If you're on prescription medication, try to arrange having an extra set. Those 24-hour Walgreens' pharmacies probably aren't going to be open.

When a White House shill pretends to be a journalist, does she still get the press discount?

Could it be that Patrick Fitzgerald regards Judith Miller as a material witness, possibly a co-conspirator and/or accomplice, rather than a journalist?

Most of Miller's hacks in the press have lemming'd up behind her, crying about protecting sources. It's certainly easier to cry about persecution than say, doing reporting.

Judith Miller’s recent history is fascinating, to put it mildly. She sabotaged an earlier Fitzpatrick effort to nail three Muslim charities that were financing terrorist groups (see TPM’s excellent article on this).

But wait, there's more. Judith Miller knew and worked with Dr. Kelly, who said the U.K. "sexed up" the dossier on Iraq. But Miller neglected to mention her long association with him or that he assisted her in writing her book “Germs: Biological Weapons and America’s Secret War” when she wrote about his "suicide.”

Other, real journalists don't think much of Miller's journalistic credentials. Others questioned the official line on Dr. Kelly's death.

Frankly, the press have been tools of this Administration, and that they’re lining up behind Miller (Miller!) instead of pursuing the Karl Rove leak is surprising to no one.

No wonder they are held in lower regard than my profession – and I work for the crooks on Wall St.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

A little bit of Iraq was exported to London

I have been skipping in and out of different blogs and the comments on the London disaster today. The early comments were anxious to head off any "conspiracy theories." Don't even think about attributing this to the machinations of a MI5 or CIA. Sheesh. We know it's the Iraq Group, the Neocon cabal inside the White House. Well, those were the early posts. Then came the rebuttals - in a nutshell, this is not the time to toe the party line.

Think about it this way: the perpetrators elude the UK's multitude of security forces, pull off this massive attack, and immediately Blair & the boys know who did it and why they did it? (The same reasoning can be applied to 9/11 and Madrid's 3/11.) And once they've made their statements, they're done. No need to offer proof.

Based on the very sketchy reports from the local sports radio station, my first thoughts were that these attacks sounded like they were pulled off with military precision. My second thought was surprise at the low fatality count - 3* in that first report. That sounds like a message is being sent.
(*At last report, the deaths stood at 37, and over 700 injured.)

London was not prepared for this. Conflicting reports on casualty numbers, number of bombs, where the attacks happened. It's still getting straightened out. Reporters on the scene were stating that bobbies were preventing them from interviewing people. And London has 4.5 million CC cameras. They haven't found anything in that footage yet? Because if not one of those cameras caught a single incriminating action, then scrap them all. Obviously they don't work. The London Underground is closed and will remain so until tomorrow (Friday, July 8 2005).

So the early comments said that Bush, Blair & Co. couldn't be behind this because there's no upside. Of course there's upside - they could dispense with the charade of dealing with Congress/Parliament and by executive order (aka fiat) implement all the things the populace doesn't want. What's that, you ask? National ID cards, keeping the troops in Iraq, squashing the Downing Street Memos, Karl Rove's loose lips, The Patriot Act II, Bolton, supplemental spending bills, the July 11 2005 deadline for Rumsfeld to file a report on the Iraq War.

Reputable sources tell me that Rumsfeld checked recently to see if there was a minimum word/page requirement. He was all set to go with the larger font and double spacing.

It starts off something like this:
The Iraq War is going well. The death throes of the insurgency could last up to 12 years, but probably not. In spite of all the liberal press singing our praises and saying what a swell job we're doing over there, I'm here to tell you that the liberal press lies and that we are in fact doing a swell job and everything is going great. Anyone who says otherwise is a traitor who hates freedom. To question any funding requests for the Iraq War is a traitor who hates freedom. And if you're a Democratic, you're already in the hole and have a lot of work to do just to hang onto your citizenship status.

And finally, terrorists are nothing but slack-jawed rats, and all rats have to suck the pipe.
Signed, Donald Rumsfeld

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Gonzales goes to Iraq, or, How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Alberto hunkers down with the frontline troops, sharing his favorite combat wound stories with them, like the time he split his lip trying to bite the cap off a beer at a Juarez whore house.

Saturday, July 02, 2005

Rove gets outed

The best show in town will be the White House/Karl Rove getting out of this jam.

In other news, Bush's speech on Tuesday (June 28, 2005) didn't do anything. Zogby poll numbers this week show 42% of Americans are in favor of impeaching Bush. Is Karl Rove losing his touch? Except perhaps in the Central/Great Lakes region, where 52% are opposed and 38% in favor. How embarrassing. What a poor showing. We'll do better in the next poll. [And what's with dropping "Midwest?" Too archaic?]

United States wrong-footed again. The Iraqi ambassador to the U.N. is reporting that his nephew, who was cooperating with a U.S. Army search of his house, was found dead with a single bullet to his neck. Whoops.

The unpseakable in pursuit of the uneatable
Reports are starting to trickle out that our overworked, overstressed, overdeployed troops are now getting Prozac. If the cannon fodder gets too shellshocked, they might do something crazy, like fragging the ones responsible for this situation. This may be why Rumsfeld, Cheney, and Bush have better armor than the frontline troops.

First, we have to kill all the Oakland A's

Why is it so much easier to decode the odds on football and the ponies than baseball?

Alright, the Sox (read Jose Contreras) fell to Oakland, in Oakland. They're at 53-25, 9.5 up on the Twins. We've got a couple more series before the All-Star break, both back in Chicago. Garland is pitching tonight, against Saarloos (4-4, RHP). Looking at the bullpen stats for the A's over the last 3 games means that the Sox have to beat the $&#@( out of Saarloos right away to A) get some runs, and B) force the bullpen to come in early and tire them out. The rest of the AL West will thank us too.

Why the talk about trading Crede? Are they paying attention to Contreras' downhill slide? As a matter of fact, Hernandez and Garcia scare the bejesus out of me when they take the mound too, but Contreras is the scariest. The Sox bulk up the starting rotation and Crede at the hot corner will take care of the rest.

Sports Illustrated can't seem to mention the White Sox without dragging the stupid Cubs along. And Cannell is predicting the Cubs will get the wild card. Really? Is it just that the view from the South Side of Chicago shows the Cubs for what they are - nothing? Even if they had talent on the team, Dusty Baker is the manager who will shephard them to a wild card finish?

And finally, on attendance. We admit it - the White Sox have a smaller fan base. The Cubs draw the drunken mob demographic and we draw the baseball fans. We cede the point - the drunken mob is bigger.