Friday, January 20, 2006

News from around the world with scant regard for punctuation

Greenpeace and Sierra Club have proposed adding Iraqi minorities to Endangered Species List.

Pat Robertson on the rebuttal:
And so it was foretold in the Book of Judges!
It came to pass that United States Army said unto the British Army, Come up with me into my lot, that we may fight against the Canaanites, er, terrorists, and I will likewise will go with thee into thy lot. By the way, what is your lot?
And the British Army said, We will tell thou later.

So the two armies went up and the LORD delivered the Canaanites, er terrorists. (How about this - we'll just sticketh with Canaanites for the purpose of this homily/rebuttal.) They found Al-Zarqawi in Wahdah district in Baghdad, and cut off his thumbs and his great toes.
It wasn't Al-Zarqawi. And the armies said Whoopeth, pardon us. And left note with thy insurance information.

So it came to pass a little later that spies saw a man coming out of Capitol Hill and they said unto him, Shew us the entrance into Capitol Hill and we will shew you a goodeth time. Ask for Abramoff. And the man shewed them the entrance, and they smote the Capitol with the edge of the sword. But they letteth go the man. And his family, even though they weren't parteth of the original deal. And the man said what a bunch of welshers.

And then the children of United States did evil in the sight of the LORD and filibustered Pres. Bush's Supreme Court nomination. And he delivered them into the hands of the spoilers that spoiled them.
Okay, I'm not really what that line means either.

And the LORD left those nations, without driving them out hastily, neither delivered he them into the hands of Al-Zarqawi.

And the LORD doesn't like fat men.

All of this is in Judges 1- 3.

Go, rest in peace.

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